


It

by Angel_made_of_scars



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-28
Updated: 2016-04-28
Packaged: 2018-06-05 03:03:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,625
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6686569
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Angel_made_of_scars/pseuds/Angel_made_of_scars
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's not an it. It was Cas. It IS Cas.</p>
            </blockquote>





	It

Cas, who hit the ground, and didn't move, not responding to his own name or satans.

Cas, who's spasms had made Dean yell to Sam that they pull over, as he had a seizure in the back seat.

Cas, who despite being carried inside, hadn't woken.

Cas, who now laid on his bed, sweaty, weak, and unresponsive.

Not an 'it'. Never an 'it'. Cas.

Dean sighed as he ran the wet cloth over Cas' forehead again. It looked like it was time to remove Cas' last dignified layer. Not that it would help, but he would try it anyway.

He did just that, stripping Cas of his pants and then running the wet cloth over both his legs. He stood and went to the bathroom to rinse out the cloth, and when he was back he put it over Cas' forehead again. He took Cas' limp hand in his and took a calming breath before speaking.

"You need to wake up Cas." Dean mumbled.

"You have to. You have to wake up, because... I'm worried about you. I don't know why you seized up earlier, or why you're sweating so bad. Maybe you're dying, I don't know." Dean said quietly.

"Are you dying?" Dean whispered. Still, Cas didn't answer.

"You know, I'm really impressed by you. What you did back there... You did good. Just thought I'd tell you. You hear me?" Dean asked. He didn't wait for an answer. He picked up the rag and wiped at Cas' arms again, before situating it back on his face.

He opened his mouth to try to talk idly again, but there was no point. He felt the fight leave his body and he took Cas' hand in his again.

"Cas... I'm scared. I need you to be ok." Dean said. He squeezed his hand before continuing.

"You know, I wonder what shape you'll come back in. I wonder if you'll be ok, or if you'll be crazy again, like the last time you got taken over by your devil of a brother, literally." Dean mused.

"Hey, you remember back then? Man, I was pissed at you, but you just took it. Sorry about that, by the way. I don't think I ever apologized. God, I'm a rotten person aren't I?" Dean said.

He took a moment to take the rag back to the bathroom and wet it again, before coming back. He ran it over Cas' hair then spread it out flat on his chest.

"What did you like back then, huh? Honey, and bees, and board games." Dean said. He chuckled and looked up, seeing the Cas hadn't changed before continuing.

"You've got to come back, and bring me some honey. You can set up a hive here, one of those boxes, maybe behind the bunker or something." Dean said. He sighed and looked away.

"Or, maybe you're not like that at all. Maybe you're stuck in your own head because you're human, and you're in a coma." Dean said, before cracking a weak smile.

"Mr. Comatose is back, huh?"

Dean sighed as he moved the rag again, this time dabbing around his neck, where the sweat was gathering. He pressed his hand to Cas' head, but it still burned, like he knew it would.

"I mean, you haven't pissed yourself yet, so you can't be completely human yet." Dean attemped a joke, but his brow creased in worry.

"Unless you just don't need to because you're dehydrated. I mean, when was the last time you had anything to drink? That would explain the fever. Man, do I need to go get you an IV?" Dean asked. He took a breath and rested his head in his hands, then sat up again.

"I would you know. Get you an IV. I'd get you that metal pole it hangs on too, so you could move around." Dean said.

"We could get you a wheelchair. I'd make you some ramps, so when you wake up, you don't have to use your legs. I could switch your drip to nutrients, and we could get you going, get you walking again, getting your strength back in little bits, like they do in hospitals." Dean explained.

"Hell, I'd just carry you if you would wake up." He muttered.

Dean stopped again to get up and wet the cloth. Cas' heated skin was soaking it up too quickly. He rinsed it in freezing water and came back, rubbing down Cas' legs and arms once more. His whole body trembled in a shiver he couldn't control, despite the heat coming from his body, and Dean sighed in worry. He draped the rag over Cas' whole face this time, then thought better of it and put in over his chest.

"You know, Cas, I'm pissed. I'm pissed that you would do this to yourself, and I'm pissed that you let out the devil. I know why you did it though. You did it to try to save our asses, again, and I'm thankful for that." Dean said.

"You know, generally other hunters won't die for you. They'll help you, they'll defend you, but they won't die for you. Family dies for you. You... you died for me and Sam, multiple times. You gave up heaven for us, for me. By extension, you know that makes you family, right? My family?" Dean said. 

"I'd die for you too, you know. I know I don't say that, or act like that, but I would. Because... You matter to me. You're family." He said. He looked up hopefully, but there was no change.

"I need you to wake up Cas. We can go for a drive, you, me, and Sam. Or just me- if you want. We can go to white castle, and get you a burger. We can catch up on stuff that doesn't have to do with killing things." Dean said frantically. He rubbed at his neck as he felt his face heat up.

"You've got to wake up for- shit, for our date, ok? Do you hear me Cas?" Dean asked.

He didn't expect an answer, but the silence was still like a punch to the gut. Even more alarming was that the rise and fall of his chest that Dean had been watching abruptly stuttered to a stop.

"Cas?!" Dean yelled. He reached out hastily, and took Cas' hand in his.

A tidal wave of force hit him, and he was knocked backwards, enough that he almost fell off his chair. His body went hot, burning hot, like he was on fire, then abruptly cold, back and forth. A presence entered his mind, and he wanted to feel panic, but then he noticed Cas. His lips twitching and his brow creased.

The voice he heard was most definitely not his, and not that of an evil entity. It was Cas, pure and completely, Cas. He was loud like thunder as he spoke, and Dean was sure it was in a foreign tongue, but he understood it completely.

I can hear you.

Dean choked as he was let go of, and started to cough. He leaned over towards the trash can, thinking for a brief moment that be may vomit, but the dizziness passed and he sat up. His throat felt raw, like he had been screaming, and maybe he had. His chest hurt, and his hand felt like it had been electrocuted.

As what happened set in, he forgot about his own issues and looked up at Cas. He was as still as before, no sign anything had happened. His breathing was normal, and as Dean hesitantly checked for a pulse,he found that it was still there. The only thing that had changed was his sickness. He could physically see Cas' skin gaining a deep red blush.

"Damn Cas, your real form is... Intense." Dean said quietly.

He let himself relax for a moment before standing up. He took the rag that was on Cas' chest and went to the sink. He wet it again and came back, then put it on Cas' forehead.

"Guess that took a lot of energy, huh? You're not human though, that's good, right?" Dean said. He took Cas' hand again, tensing as he waited for another message, but nothing happened.

"Your fever is getting worse, I can tell. Your skin is going the color of a tomato. I might have to put you in an ice bath soon. Sorry in advance." Dean said. Cas didn't acknowledge him, but he felt forgiven.

"Hey, you can hear me, so I want you to listen, alright? I want you to sleep. I want you to actually sleep. I'll stay here and watch out for you, ok? So you just rest, and if you're awake in there, you focus on getting better. The rest I can take care of, alright?" Dean said. He smiled and shifted in his seat, getting more comfortable.

"What was it you said? I used to catch you staring at me while I slept, and you said you were "watching over me"? Like a real guardian angel." Dean chuckled.

"I'll watch over you now, alright? So go on to sleep. I'll be here when you wake up." Dean promised.

If Dean hadn't practically studied Castiels facial features in the past, he wouldn't have caught it. The minute little crease of his eyebrows, barely noticable. He had been looking at Cas for hours now though, looking for a change. He had been looking at him for years, in fact.

So he noticed when Cas finally slipped into sleep, intead of a restless, fevered state. He also noticed when Cas' finger twitched. Dean took his hand without a second thought.

"I'm here. I hear you." Dean whispered.


End file.
